Prof. Nevzat Tarhan: "A humane ecosystem is the cure for loneliness"

Üsküdar University, Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences, Department of Psychology, Psychology Club and Positive Psychology Club jointly held the second event titled 'Psychology Talks with Prof. Nevzat Tarhan'. In the program, which attracted great interest from the participants, Prof. Nevzat Tarhan stated that long-term loneliness brings unhappiness. Stating that a humane ecosystem is the cure for loneliness, Tarhan emphasized that living in a good and warm ecosystem can improve human skills in a good way.

The second of the Psychology Talks was held at Üsküdar University South Campus Fuat Sezgin Conference Hall. Faculty academics and students participated in the event.

"Loneliness brings unhappiness"

Pointing out that human beings are neurobiologically relational beings, Prof. Nevzat Tarhan said that loneliness has increased as a serious epidemic. Tarhan stated that "The World Health Organization has presented loneliness as one of the three major dangers expected in the future. The first is global income inequality, the second is climate change, and the third is loneliness. It is not very noticeable in Türkiye; however, there is a very serious epidemic in the world. This loneliness brings unhappiness behind it because human beings are neurobiologically relational. Our brain is an associative organ. Our brains are not programmed for loneliness, and when this happens, people become unhappy. Unlike other living things, human beings need an innate object of attachment."

The wheelhouse of the brain is doing rational balancing...

Talking about the differences between male and female brains in relieving loneliness, Prof. Tarhan said; "Neurobiologically, our brains are programmed to relieve loneliness. When it comes to relieving loneliness, the male brain and the female brain work differently. Especially when a problem arises, the male brain works result-oriented. If the result is not good, he retreats to his shelter and prefers solitude. The female brain also works towards relaxation by sharing in a moment of stress. That's how he programmed it. When two sides are stressed, one side's brain is stressed because most of the time the frontal lobe is disabled. Hasty, impatient people make more mistakes because the control of meta consciousness in the brain weakens, and their impulses move. Especially people with dominant emotions enter into conflict more easily because they act more impulsively. The balance between the left and right brain is provided by the forebrain. If the person has developed themselves, the frontal region of the brain, that is, the wheelhouse, can balance where to act emotionally and where to act rationally."

"There is an increase in narcissistic people globally"

Pointing out that empathy is a learned skill, Prof. Tarhan pointed out that people who lack empathy are increasing. Tarhan stated that "A person with developed empathy is more successful in relieving loneliness. People who lack empathy are cluster B personalities. These are narcissistic, obsessive compulsive and antisocial personalities. These people are condemned to loneliness. Globally, there is an increase in cluster B personalities, especially narcissistic personalities. Narcissistic personalities are unable to empathize, they want the world to revolve around them. These people often have ego battles and power struggles."

The most important problem in marriage is the lack of understanding of emotional needs

Stating that the sense of attraction in people varies according to the person's philosophy of life, Prof. Tarhan emphasized the importance of intention. Tarhan expressed that "If there is love in the relationship, if there is an intention to go on a journey together, this relationship works. In our culture, the relationship between refik and refika is called. Refik means male companion and Refika means female companion. They see togetherness as companionship. For this reason, the most important problem in marriage is the inability of both parties to understand and read each other's emotional needs and the crises that occur there."

"In solitude, a person can be a majority on their own..."

Drawing attention to the chosen loneliness, Tarhan explained this situation with an example of Tolstoy. Tarhan stated that "Tolstoy stumbles upon a hermit. He meets the hermit and says, 'Are you not tired of living so alone?' The hermit said, 'No, I am not alone. I have two rabbits, a donkey, two eagles, and a lion.'

"I have two rabbits, that is, my feet, and they always want to run.

I have two eagles, that is, my eyes, and I am constantly trying to discipline them.

I have a donkey and I try to teach it to be patient.

I have one lion that wants to attack everyone, and my brain says I am trying to take a hold on it too."

A person who embarks on a journey of self-improvement in loneliness can be a majority on their own."

"A humane ecosystem is the cure for loneliness"

Emphasizing that living in a good and warm ecosystem can improve human skills in a good way, Tarhan stated that loneliness increases the risk of Alzheimer's. Tarhan said that "Loneliness is the most important psychosocial problem of people in advanced age and is one of the causes of Alzheimer's. That's because the human brain works neurologically through social contact. Experiments are being carried out on mice. As soon as mice are born, they are blindfolded. They open the eyes of one group of mice one month later, the next group three months later, and the other group six months later. After a month and three months, the rats are stunned at first, then learn to see. After six months, the mice whose eyes are opened are left blind. In other words, if the light does not go to the visual stimuli, in fact, if our visual organs remain without stimuli, the person becomes neurologically blind and does not see even though one’s eyes are healthy. The same is true of man's human abilities. For us to be human, we need to live in a humane environment. If we do not live in a human environment, in society, in social contact, and in a good and warm ecosystem, we can become monsters or passive. A humane ecosystem is the cure for loneliness."

"We cannot understand human beings without understanding the neurobiological foundations of human psychology"

Talking about the relationship between the development of mirror neurons in our brain and loneliness, Prof. Tarhan said that "The emotions of the heart speak in the brain of the other party. In theory of mind, only emotions speak. You try to understand what the other side is thinking, you make assumptions, and you create concepts. In theory, you are developing a counter-theory against the concept one produces. This is the general neurobiological function of our brain. These make people relational beings. In other words, the more we develop the mirror neurons of our brain, the more we get rid of loneliness because we cannot understand human beings without understanding the neurobiological foundations of human psychology."

"Hypnosis means entering a person's implicit memory and taking over their consciousness"

Talking about the effects of nocebo and hypnosis, Prof. Nevzat Tarhan said that "Under the nocebo effect, the brain takes a position that I have that disease if someone believes that I am sick or I have this disease. The brain produces chemicals related to it and reacts to it. If a person believes that they will get dizzy while standing, the person starts to tremble. We see this in hypnosis as well. A person says, 'Your hand is completely numb right now, you are relaxed, you do not hear anything, you do not feel anything, you are completely relaxed, you are at peace, but this part is numb,' and the person thinks that their hand is numb. That one says I touch your hand with a hot iron, that person says it will burn but you will not feel any pain, you say it will burn but you will not feel any pain, you touch their hand, the person does not react at all, then they wake up and looks at it and it gets a blister. The person's part of body is on fire because hypnosis means entering the person's implicit memory and taking over their consciousness, handing over their meta consciousness to you, handing over cortical control to you. A person cannot hand it over to someone they do not believe in and trust. In hypnosis therapy, it collects water here, the brain receives it as a message that it is burning, it sends a message to the cells there, the vessel expands, and it collects water. This is the Nocebo effect, the body's perception of something that does not exist as existing..."

"Trust should be essantial in life, fear should be the exception"

Stating that trust should be essential in life, Tarhan made the following remarks: "When there is no trust, there is no stable, consistent and continuous relationship. There is no warm relationship in the mother-child relationship, in this case, life feels like unsafe for the child, and the child lives with fear. However, trust in life should be essential, but fear should be exception. When fear is the main exception, there are sudden deaths because the brain secretes growth hormone because life is unsafe."

"It is necessary to make decisions with the synthesis of emotion and logic"

Stating that the field that psychology is dealing with the most at the moment is decision-making mechanisms, Prof. Nevzat Tarhan stated that "If a person makes the right decisions, their life goes in the right direction, and if they make the wrong decisions, they ge in the wrong direction. It's not enough to make decisions with emotions alone, it's not enough to make decisions with logic alone, the left and right brains must make decisions together. In other words, it is necessary to make decisions with a synthesis of emotion and logic. When you make such a decision, it means that you are managing the steering wheel well. If you have emotions, your engine is running well. If your steering wheel is good, you can move forward on the path of life without somersaulting. After all, if we are managing ourselves, we will first enrich our psychological resources and strengthen our psychological capital. The more social networks there are, the wider the social capital of a person. Then the person becomes more socially successful and relieves loneliness more."

At the end of the interview, Prof. Nevzat Tarhan signed the book 'Conscious Youth', which he wrote for young people, to the students.

 

Üsküdar News Agency (ÜNA)