Prof. Nevzat Tarhan: "If the family is a safe space, the child will be raised well"

President of Üsküdar University Psychiatrist Prof. Nevzat Tarhan was the live broadcast guest of the “Balçiçek İlter ile Şimdi” program hosted by Balçiçek İlter, broadcast on EKOL TV. Tarhan made striking evaluations on the issues of "deteriorating family order, increasing addictions and mean world syndrome". Underlining the need to invest in people and family, Tarhan said that household fragility has increased recently. Reminding that the family is the institution they trust the most when asked to university students, Tarhan noted that young people attach importance to family. Tarhan stated that if the family is in a safe space, the child will be raised well.

President of Üsküdar University Psychiatrist Prof. Nevzat Tarhan answered the questions of journalist Balçiçek İlter on the live broadcast of EKOL TV. Tarhan made remarkable statements about the deteriorating family order, increasing addictions and mean world syndrome.

"Right now, people are not afraid of God, but they are afraid of the media"

Answering journalist İlter's questions about the Narin and newborn incidents, which have been discussed in the media in recent days, Tarhan emphasized the feudal structure. Stating that the leader is blindly obeyed in these structures, Tarhan said that "Right now, people are not afraid of God, but they are afraid of the media. That is why they always reproach the media. We are in such a time. The media should not in good conscience let this issue be forgotten. It is a delicate matter... The fact that the newborn does not make you forget all other evils, that they are brought to the agenda, has a preventive effect on evil. In other words, it becomes a kind of representative of the public conscience. It is characteristic of many villages in Anatolia. As seen in the Narin incident, there is a feudal structure there. In feudal structures, the leader is obeyed blindly, acting on his mark. That is why there is a serious plan to make people forget about this incident and cover it up. Although so many gendarmes and police went, no confession was made. They did not fall apart. Because in feudal structures it is. There is a draw to the death. Since the public conscience is sensitive to this issue, the court will act according to this public conscience, so if this issue remains on the agenda and is not forgotten, the truth will come out. In other words, even if 100 percent is not found, it occurs at a rate of 80-90 percent."

Love should also be shown fairly among children...

Mentioning that children should be treated equally in the family, Tarhan expressed that "People's sense of accountability has weakened. Justice has declined. In a family, if a child always makes mistakes, if the parents always protect that child, there will be no peace. In other words, there is a need for love justice among children. When the parent does not, the other child looks at their mother and father sideways and thinks, "They love my sibling very much, and they do not treat me like that and ignore me." Therefore, the most important childhood trauma is ignoring the child. Even beating a child has less traumatic effects than ignoring it. Because at least you are aware of the existence of the child. When you ignore it, there is accumulated anger against the parents."

If there is nepotism, there is no justice!

Emphasizing that there is injustice where there is nepotism, Tarhan stated that "Ours is a leader-type society. A society that looks up to its leaders. If there is no fair management in a company, if the uncle and children keep one and the father and children keep the other, there will be polarization. If there is favoritism, there will be injustice. When we talk about justice, we always understand the court. The court is the legal norms at the very end, there are also social norms and conscientious norms. All these norms influence each other. If the leader in a company is always unfair, everyone in that company is looking for an opportunity to slap someone. Thus, this also applies to the country. That is why Anatolia has an ancient wisdom and culture. As soon as the management recovers and corrects itself, everyone slowly begins to improve. So, let's not be pessimistic."

The human brain is more sensitive to the negative and the threat!

Talking about the reactions of the human brain to positive and negative events, Tarhan said that "The human brain is programmed for life and life. As such, it is more sensitive to the negative, to the threat. It responds to a threat event after 50 milliseconds and positive situations after 300 milliseconds. When we look at the brain with evoked potentials, when there is a threat, it drops everything and focuses on it. The brain does this automatically. Because of this, negative things spread rapidly. When there is no positive, good and beauty, negativity spreads like a virus."

"Five-person households are decreasing, one-person households are increasing"

Drawing attention to the importance of trust in the family, Tarhan said that the institution that young people trust the most is the family institution. Tarhan stated that "According to Turkish statistics, divorce rates in the first five years of marriage are around 38-39 percent. Very high. It is also 50 percent in the world. Türkiye is a little better on this regard; however, when we look at the statistics, we see that household vulnerability is increasing. Five-person households are decreasing, one-person households are increasing. TurkStat statistics show this. We ask questions to university students about the family, we conduct surveys. There, the most trusted institution turns out to be the family. When we ask what the most reliable institution at the moment is, they say family. This is very important because the world is not like that. Türkiye has a great chance to protect it. The state should invest in people and families instead of investing in stone and land."

Marriage is not a competitive relationship, but a complementary one...

Noting that marriage is a complementary relationship, Tarhan stated that "After the 1960s, there was a good development in the women's liberation movement all over the world. However, after a while, this turned into radical feminism. Radical feminism has turned this relationship into a war between men and women. In such cases, an understanding has come to the fore that what the one who holds the power say happens. However, the family is like a ship. Everyone on the ship cares about the well-being of the ship and the future of the ship. A person does not get angry with the captain and damage the ship. If a person can think about what is best for me and my family when they are angry with their spouse in the family, they will make few mistakes there. Marriage is not a competitive relationship, but a complementary one. They both need each other, because that is how they were made. The most important fact in the universe is the fact of need. Thus, there is a great balance between good and bad, between heat and cold."

"Young people care about family"

Talking about the importance that young people attach to the concept of family, Tarhan concluded his remarks as follows: "Gen Z youth have unconventional sides. They do not want to get married, and they want to get everything easy; however, they are very sympathetic. Their expectations are high, and their expectations of justice are high. They are more cautious against evil. For this reason, if we can set a good example for young people, these young people will create a much better youth for our future. Young people care about family. Because the transfer of culture was done by the family and society before, now the media is doing it. Role models change because the media does it. Thus, if the family is a safe place, the child will be raised well. The families of successful and happy children can sit down and talk for the well-being of the family. The house became a safe space. In other words, there is no constant war at home, and there is no tension at home, which means such a warm environment has been created at home."

Üsküdar News Agency (ÜNA)