Psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated that the elderly love young people who ask questions, saying, “The thing that makes the elderly happiest is young people coming to them for advice.”
Tarhan added that it is impossible for a person who does good deeds to be alone in their later years, while selfish people remain alone, and that people with good social relationships age less.
Üsküdar Üniversitesi Founding Rector, Psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated that there is currently a culture of living ‘as if one will never die’ in popular culture, and that people who live this way become depressed when they face death and old age.
Prof. Dr. Tarhan noted that our genes allow us to live up to 120 years with a healthy lifestyle, stating, “If a person's genes indicate a height of 1.80 cm, they will grow up to 1.80 if they take care of themselves; otherwise, they may remain at 1.60s or 1.70s. The same applies to age. Therefore, aging is our biological destiny that begins with birth. Modernism teaches us to be happy by ignoring this.”
Are We Making Narcissistic Investments?
Prof. Dr. Tarhan also explained that as people observe illness and old age, they make narcissistic investments in their bodies, adding:
“Narcissistic investment means loving one's body, age, life, and self excessively. To invest one's love in it. Whatever a person invests their love in, they have made a narcissistic investment in that. If a person has made a narcissistic investment in their body, they panic if even a tiny part of it hurts. If their health deteriorates slightly, they immediately go to the hospital and feel ill when they see an ambulance. This is how a person defines meaning. If they invested in money, they immediately fall into depression and crisis when there is a small financial crisis or loss of money. If they invested in position, they immediately collapse when they lose that position. For example, some CEOs get cancer within 6 months after retirement.”
Prof. Dr. Tarhan stated that a person who makes narcissistic investments based on interest cannot give up aesthetics, adding, “However, in narcissistic investment, it is important not only to add something to oneself, but to add something to humanity, to life, to the homeland, and to live in accordance with creation.”
Every Age Has Its Pros, Cons, and Beauty
Psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated that humanity's greatest nightmares are expressed as loneliness, meaninglessness, and uncertainty, and continued as follows:
“Among these, humanity's greatest fear is meaninglessness. When one adds meaning to life, uncertainty disappears, and loneliness also disappears. Meaning is the critical concept here. When one adds meaning to their work, it fits into a logical framework in the mind.
How can meaning be added to old age? The greatest loss of meaning is when the elderly try to resemble the young. Every age has its pros, cons, and beauty. A person can live well if they know the beauty of each age. It's the same in childhood, adolescence, and middle age... In advanced ages, we lose some abilities, but we gain some others. For example, what are the gained abilities? Becoming wise, being the person asked for advice in the family, being people who guide and help others, having produced some works, raising a virtuous child, engaging in beneficial knowledge, leaving behind good things that continue after death – these add meaning to life. In such a situation, a person says, 'I've aged, but I've aged well; I've added meaning to society and life.'”
Living in Past Memories is Old Age…
Prof. Dr. Tarhan stated that those who do not invest in the afterlife are more likely to fall into old age depression, saying, “If a person cannot step out of their comfort zone, does not learn new things, is not surprised, thinks they know many things, says 'I know everything,' has a high ego, is not curious, does not question, does not research, only lives in past memories, constantly repeats old things – these are called old age.”
Prof. Dr. Tarhan noted that there are three types of aging: chronological aging, biological aging, and psychological aging, adding, “If a person is learning new things, stepping out of their comfort zone, and is lively and energetic, they are not really aging themselves. Since these people's brains already secrete happiness hormones, they don't even get Alzheimer's, even if they carry the genes. When you ask how they stay young, rest assured that people living this way stay young. If our body is a state, our brain is the government. If a person manages their brain well, it means they manage their entire body and health well.”
An Elderly Person Who Spends Their Day at the Cafe Ages Faster
Emphasizing the importance of using one's accumulated knowledge appropriately for their age, Prof. Dr. Tarhan stated:
“The thing that makes the elderly happiest is young people coming to them for advice. Young people, too, do not want to ask questions thinking 'I already know'. The elderly love young people who ask questions, and they particularly love children. Since they are curious learners, the elderly share what they know.
Old age does not mean withdrawing to a corner of the house or going to a nursing home and living that way. In society, the elderly are often seen as disadvantaged individuals. The World Health Organization calls the age range of 65 to 74 'young-old.' It calls 75 to 84 'middle-old.' And 85 and above 'oldest-old.' Because the average age of the entire population has risen so much, there is a need to categorize it. In fact, the ideal is for a person to find something they can work on until the end of their life. Having a purpose when waking up in the morning means that an elderly person who spends their day at a cafe ages faster.”
Prof. Tarhan stated that culturally, we perceive going to a nursing home as 'abandonment,' and explained that no one wants to leave a happy elderly person, someone who has left good marks in society, alone, and that even if such individuals go to a nursing home by choice, they have many visitors.
Those with Good Social Relationships Age Less…
Prof. Dr. Tarhan stated that one should aim to be productive until their last breath, adding, “This production may not necessarily be physical production; it could be mental production, guiding children…”
Prof. Dr. Tarhan also noted that people with good social relationships age less, stating that due to the high loneliness among the elderly in Europe, a budget is allocated and investments are made in this area.
Prof. Dr. Tarhan concluded his words by stating that those who help people selflessly and unconditionally are unknowingly loved, saying, “It is impossible for a person who does good deeds to be alone in their later years; selfish people remain alone.”