Prof. Nevzat Tarhan: “Early signals against school violence must be read correctly”

President of Üsküdar University Psychiatrist Prof. Nevzat Tarhan met online with guidance counselors as part of the “CAN-KAR 2: From Heart to Heart” project, organized within the scope of the Erzincan PDR Summit in cooperation with the Erzincan Provincial Directorate of National Education and the Northeastern Anatolia Development Agency. Making important evaluations under the title “Psychiatric and Neurological Foundations of Violence,” Tarhan emphasized that social and emotional early signals against increasing school violence on a global scale must be read correctly. Stating that today’s misconception of self-confidence fuels narcissism and lack of empathy, Tarhan advised parents to be active listeners instead of giving advice against emotional confusion during adolescence. Tarhan also drew attention to the fact that digitalization and uncontrolled screen exposure lead to desensitization problems such as emotional blunting and ecoparalysis in children.

Guidance counselors showed great interest in the online program. 

“First, risk groups need to be identified”

Psychiatrist Prof. Nevzat Tarhan, drawing attention to the global dimension of school violence and emphasizing the need to identify risk groups for early diagnosis; “School violence incidents were particularly high in the US in the 2000s. According to statistics, approximately 340,000 students carried weapons to school annually. Various measures were taken to reduce this. In recent years, we can say that school violence in the US has statistically begun to decrease. School violence was increasing very rapidly, but effective methods were developed to address it. We are now focusing on school violence, the issue of carrying weapons to school, and domestic violence. They call this domestic violence. Apart from violence against women, there is also violence against the elderly and children. When we consider it in this framework, school violence also emerges as a different type of violence. Now, there are some clues for identifying a student who commits violence at school. Some of these clues are social, and some are particularly emotional and behavioral. There are various signs. There are solution proposals, but first, risk groups need to be identified. We need to identify children who give 'red flags,' meaning those who signal and are at risk of causing incidents. For example, there are behavioral clues in children. Children who experience anger outbursts, are prone to fights, harm animals and objects, are inclined to bullying or cyberbullying, and are frequently involved in disciplinary incidents… Additionally, individuals with weapon, violence, and revenge-themed statements, those who collect related items, and children who use threatening expressions in social media posts also fall into this group. These are considered as risk groups,” he began his words. 

“These children need to be observed”

Tarhan detailed the psychological dynamics, emotional, and social signals of children in the risk group; “Children in the risk group have intense feelings of exclusion. They are hopeless and pessimistic. They constantly perceive themselves as being humiliated; they are always angry. They may show symptoms of trauma. They are prone to paranoid thoughts, are suspicious, and are lonely in class. They do not have close friendships or strong social ties. They are individuals with a depressive mood. You will see that the faces of such individuals do not smile much. In other words, if they constantly perceive themselves as being humiliated when you say something, this is also one of the emotional signs. In terms of social signs, detachment from a peer group is observed. Cliques are more common during adolescence. We are currently talking mostly about adolescents; adolescence is a period when such structures are seen more intensely. A history of violence within the family is also important data. If there is substance use, it is already one of the biggest risk groups. Furthermore, if there is a sudden drop in academic performance in a child who was previously doing well, attention should be paid to this. If a child who normally does not raise their voice starts to do so, or if they have become detached from their previous friend group, these are important signs. If they frequently exhibit complaining behaviors or constantly experience group stress, these children need to be observed,” he said. 

“As anger accumulates, it evolves into hostility”

Tarhan stated that parental mistakes can lead to narcissism; “Due to the global system, while aiming to raise self-confident children, we tend to raise leader-type children. If a child sets their own rules, for example, has no tolerance for being told 'no' or having boundaries set, and reacts disproportionately when boundaries are set, this child is in the risk group. The situation is the same if they struggle to control their impulses and have come to a position of managing the family. If a child or adolescent has come to a position of managing the family, becoming the leader of the house, whereas the parents should be the leaders of the house, and parents should exercise joint leadership, the child takes over the leadership when the parents cannot make the child accept this. This situation is often mistaken for self-confidence. However, this is not self-confidence, but self-admiration. Self-admiration means narcissism. This child, exhibiting narcissistic traits, expects everyone at school to treat them privileged, just as their mother and father do at home. When not treated this way, they feel immense inner pain, believing they are excluded, not valued, and not loved. They accumulate anger inside against those who say no to them. In this process, the person first suffers pain, then this pain turns into anger, and as anger accumulates, it evolves into hostility,” he stated. 

“Corridors need to be created for young people to express their energies”

Tarhan, emphasizing the importance of correctly directing the energy of young people; “It is necessary to create channels where children and young people can express their energies. Organizing various activities, establishing clubs, and students' participation in these extracurricular social areas at school are extremely important. Because where there is social contact, young people learn empathy. When empathy is learned, the process progresses much healthier. Empathic communication is not one-way but two-way. Therefore, first and foremost, the mother, father, guidance counselor, classroom teacher, or psychological counselor needs to be an active listener. Instead of immediately trying to advise or lecture the child, it is necessary to actively listen to them and make them feel understood. For example, being able to say, ‘I understand your feelings, but I think it shouldn't be like this, but like that.’ Using 'I' language instead of 'you' language is very important. Instead of saying, ‘Why are you doing this?’, when you say, ‘If I were in your shoes, I would do it this way,’ the approach completely changes. It should not be forgotten that adolescence is the period when a young person searches for and finds their own identity. During this period, adolescents ask, ‘Who am I, where should I go, why?’ and experience an identity crisis. We need to be more flexible towards adolescents and not try to make them perfect like candles,” he said.

“It is not possible to completely detach the child from the screen”

Tarhan, explaining the effects of violence factors in media and within the family on child psychology; “The 0-6 age period is when a child's abstraction skills have not yet developed, while the 6-10 age period is when this skill gradually takes shape. So, how does live violence, violence in cinema and television, or violence in cartoons affect a child? Studies have tracked these three categories and revealed that the most influential factor on a child is live violence. In other words, if there is violence at home and parents use violence as a problem-solving or rights-seeking style, the child directly models this. The factor that most causes violent tendencies is precisely this live violence. Secondly, violence and mafia series on television come into play. If the child is already in such a risk group within the family, they heavily choose these characters on screen as role models. The third group of violence is violence in cartoons. If a child between 0-6 years old watches a violent film under parental supervision, since they do not yet have abstraction skills, they constantly look sideways at their parents' reactions. At this point, parents should intervene and explain the misconception through dialogue, saying, ‘This is a movie you're watching; dozens of people may be dying there, but this doesn't happen in real life.’ Today, it is not possible to completely detach a child from the screen or completely keep them away from the digital world. Children are inevitably exposed to these on television or digital platforms. That is why we recommend that content always be consumed under parental supervision, and that parents also enter the digital world that their child enters,” he stated.

“In the unseen part of the iceberg, there is depression and despair”

Tarhan, drawing attention to the global epidemic of selfishness and the lack of empathy brought by narcissism; “A global pandemic of selfishness is being experienced; even politicians are now vocalizing this truth. The biggest symptom of those afflicted by the selfishness epidemic and narcissism is a lack of empathy. These individuals lack the ability to understand others' feelings, i.e., emotional literacy. Unfortunately, the digitalization process has accelerated this situation even further. People now have fake faces, fake smiles, and fake images. Their public facades are different, their backgrounds completely distinct. While a gilded, masked appearance is displayed outwardly, when you look at the unseen part of the iceberg, i.e., the background, you see immense depression and despair. Unfortunately, humanity today has transformed from the philosophy of ‘I think, therefore I am’ to the understanding of ‘I appear, therefore I am.’ Due to social media exposure, very serious regulations are needed, especially up to the age of 15. The legal regulations and rules that have come into force in our country have seriously strengthened the hand of parents and educators. Now, it is our duty to apply these rules resolutely. In fact, we should plan these regulations according to age groups. Let's not introduce screens at all until age 3, then limit it to one hour a day, and as the child's abstraction skills develop, gradually increase this period to two or three hours. Such clear rules need to be established. If we do not take these measures, we will sacrifice our own children to this system,” he said. 

“Character building is of vital importance”

Tarhan stated that digitalization leads to emotional blunting; “Digitalization distorts personality and emotional boundaries, leading to 'emotional blunting' in humans. People have become desensitized to evil through repeated exposure. They have become blunted to the suffering of others and the deterioration in the environment, which we call ecoparalysis in scientific literature. Today, our ecosystem is being shaken, but the solution lies in efforts that strengthen character. At this point, character building is of vital importance. Individuals who focus on and succeed in character building will win the future and dominate it. Those who do not make this investment will, unfortunately, become the subjects of most psychiatric cases, violent tendencies, and deep social problems in the future. The digital world and artificial intelligence can only be our assistants. We must be the captains of artificial intelligence and digitalization. If we lose captaincy to digitalization, we cannot escape becoming victims of this system,” he concluded his words.