Üsküdar Üniversitesi Founding Rector Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan, participated as a speaker in the program organized by Kocaeli Provincial Directorate of National Education's Kocaeli Education Platform within the scope of “Education Talks.” In the program, which garnered significant interest from participants, Tarhan made evaluations under the title 'Positive Psychology in Education'. Stating that an educator is not just a conveyor of information but also of emotion, Tarhan drew attention to giving children an ego ideal. Tarhan said, “While telling our children to be intelligent, hardworking, and successful, we forget to tell them something. Alongside these three things, we also need to tell them to be good people.”
“Narcissism is not actually a clinical phenomenon, but merely a personality pathology”
Emphasizing that narcissism is not a clinical phenomenon, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said; “As a life goal, they are trying to impose the pursuit of pleasure on young people in particular. It's a system based solely on eating, drinking, and reproduction. Currently, modernism has set this as a goal for humanity. If a person sees the pursuit of pleasure as a life purpose, they eventually become narcissistic. They constantly say 'me, me, me,' acting with a sense of 'I' rather than 'we.' Such people were marginal in number, but now they have become widespread with modernism. Because narcissistic people are always selfish, they eventually find themselves alone, with no one around them. When a person becomes isolated, they experience unhappiness after a while due to these circumstances. Narcissism is not actually a clinical phenomenon, but merely a personality pathology.” he stated.
“We also need to tell them to be good people”
Prof. Dr. Tarhan said, “While telling our children to be intelligent, hardworking, and successful, we forget to tell them something. Alongside these three things, we also need to tell them to be good people. What ego ideal do we give to children? If we give children the pursuit of pleasure as an ego ideal, they wonder if it's worth living for this young ideal and realize it's not. However, positive psychology says, 'Don't seek happiness based on internal reasons, seek it based on external reasons.'”
“An educator is not just a conveyor of information, but also of emotion”
Tarhan stated that being an educator is not just about conveying information, but also has an artistic dimension, which is related to positive psychology; “Positive psychology is important for preventing a relapse after a person recovers from depression. It is also important for people's mental health to not deteriorate. So, how will this help us in education? The goal of education is not mere instruction, but fostering true education. In education, we cultivate the individual. While distance instruction exists, true distance education is not possible. Education has a master-apprentice role. Every teacher, rest assured, serves as a role model for young people more through their actions than their words. Teachers are our second heroes in life, after our parents. A person loves and emulates those they see as heroes. From elementary school age, they see their teachers as the third most important person in their life, besides their mother and father. This child tries to derive lessons and meaning from every action of the teacher. Furthermore, being an educator is not just about conveying information; it also has an artistic aspect. The artistic aspect involves being able to manage the classroom according to the individual needs of each person. If you ignore a crying student sitting in the corner of the classroom and continue with the lesson, you will not win that person over. If one person is unhappy, it also reflects on others. An educator is not just a conveyor of information, but also of emotion. This is what positive psychology teaches.” he stated.
Four Conditions for Self-Knowledge on the Path of Life!
Prof. Dr. Tarhan stated that positive psychology contributes to self-knowledge on one's life path and continued as follows; “Managing emotions is a skill that requires investment. The first condition for a person to be at peace with themselves is self-awareness, which means knowing oneself. If we don't know where we are, it doesn't matter where we are going. Therefore, knowing oneself is the first condition on a person's life journey. The second is self-management, the third is social awareness, and the fourth is relationship management. The most important thing positive psychology teaches here is relationship management with people. It provides the answer to how I can manage my relationships with people so that both I and they are happy. Positive psychology seriously demonstrates methods to teach this.”
“We need to be able to connect with the soul of the youth”
Prof. Dr. Tarhan emphasized that seeing things from the same perspective as young people is very important in winning them over. Tarhan; “When we look at the slogans of the Committee of Union and Progress, we see that young people spoke of justice, equality, freedom, and brotherhood. These slogans demanded by young people are actually the global values of the world. When we neglect these as a management, company, or any leadership, we pay the price. When we do the exact opposite, we lose the youth. If parents adopt an authoritarian, totalitarian, and criticism-averse approach at home, the child remains silent until adolescence but breaks away from the family after adolescence. I observe many young people at university who do not want to stay in their own city. The reason is that they develop a protest personality against their parents. Therefore, if we want to win over young people, we need to produce policies that align with these values of theirs. When we don't produce these, young people become children of popular culture, not ours. They watch television, engage with social media, and choose the actors there as role models. However, we need to ensure that they choose our own values and national identities as their role models. For that, we need to be able to connect with the soul of the youth.” he stated.
What matters is dancing together!
Tarhan underlined that conflict with young people would yield no positive results, but rather lead to significant problems; “Being able to speak the same language as young people is very important. Generally, at the age of twenty-two, adolescence transitions into a period of positivity. Sometimes there is delayed adolescence, and we encounter delayed adolescence quite frequently in today's youth. Delayed adolescence is such that a person is twenty-two years old but still childish. They pursue childish pleasures, don't take responsibility, and only think about freedom. However, let's not be overly critical about this. Some schools of psychology refer to adolescence as a normal schizophrenic period. If a forty-year-old person were to do what an adolescent does, you would call them schizophrenic. They have such outbursts and behaviors; they do crazy things. The word 'delikanlı' (young, hot-blooded man) comes from this. It is normal for adolescents to do somewhat unusual things. Let's not expect the maturity of a forty-year-old from them. For this reason, let's grant them the right to make mistakes. Instead of confronting and correcting adolescents or younger children, it is important to take them by our side, walk together, and dance together. When a mother, father, or educator approaches a child in an authoritarian way, discipline might be established in the classroom, but if it's discipline with love, it becomes permanent. If it's discipline based on fear, it will not be lasting. A student succeeds if they love the lesson. For them to love the lesson, they need to love the teacher. And for that, the teacher needs to love the student.” he said.
“Learning by experience is the effective education method of this era”
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated,