Stating that mental power has replaced physical strength, which was important in previous centuries, psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan, said that with changing and developing conditions, instead of gender equality, priority should be given to establishing strong cooperation within gender differences. Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated, “Both sexes should develop relationships based on strong cooperation while preserving their differences. This is also what is important in democracy and pluralism. Everyone preserves their cultural identity, but communication intensifies.”
Üsküdar Üniversitesi Founder Rector, Psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan, made evaluations regarding March 8, International Women's Day.
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan reminded that March 8, International Women's Day, is an international day defined by the United Nations, and on this day, attention is drawn to the development of women's political and social awareness based on human rights, and the celebration of their economic, political, and social achievements.
“The view that ‘Women are behind men’ is changing
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan noted that discrimination against women is a sociocultural situation encountered all over the world, and said, “International Women's Day can also be interpreted as follows: A symbol of existence against men's tendency to see women as second-class. This view is a sociocultural situation. There is a traditional tendency that 'women are behind men'. Moreover, this is not only in Eastern culture but also in Western culture; in fact, it is even more intense in the Western world. There, for centuries, the discussion 'Is a woman human or not?' took place. Even laws did not recognize a woman as an individual. In previous centuries, physical strength was important, so the world conjuncture required male dominance. However, in our age, when mental strength came to the forefront, there was no need for this strength. When the importance of mental strength was understood, the differences between women and men were minimized.”
Strong cooperation should be established within gender differences
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan noted that in line with global developments and changing and evolving conditions, instead of gender equality, priority should be given to establishing strong cooperation within gender differences, and said, “Within the framework of this determination, it should not be understood that the differences between the two sexes are rejected. The idea that 'men should change their masculinity, women their femininity, and the world should move towards unisex' is wrong. Both sexes should develop relationships based on strong cooperation while preserving their differences. This is also what is important in democracy and pluralism. Everyone preserves their cultural identity, but communication intensifies.”
“One type” does not conform to the integrity in the universe
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan noted that the universe is founded on pluralism and not created as a single type, stating, “It has been brought into existence with thousands of species of flowers, birds, or insects. The purpose of this diversity is, primarily, to ensure communication among people. It is for living beings to merge with each other, establish relations, and bring forth certain beauties. For this reason, the idea of a single type of woman or man does not conform to the integrity in the universe. This should be known, and diversity should be accustomed to. A world should be created where parties are not wronged, where those with superior mental achievement are positioned ahead and forward, and where a person who realizes themselves and proves their worth through their actions does not face discrimination because of their gender. A person's success should not be delayed due to their gender.
For instance, there are male-dominated professions where women are discriminated against due to their gender; they are unconsciously excluded. Women's Day might be considered for preventing these, or for initiating such discussions and questioning some taboos and dogmas,” he said.
Marriage has three stages
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated that there are three stages in marriage: “The first is the initial stage, nourished by romantic feelings. The second is the period of power struggle, during which both parties will get to know each other and produce smart solutions. Then comes the period of commitment. There is nothing in the world that makes people happier than a loyal partnership between a man and a woman.”
Home is not just a place used like a hotel
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan noted that after feminist movements, divorces in America exceeded 50%, and out-of-wedlock births increased extraordinarily, stating, “Even those who are married have started living with their children and lovers! They continue their lives with the understanding, ‘we got married but couldn't make each other happy. Let's be together, even in this way, for the future of our children.’ So, there is a house used like a hotel by two strangers. To what extent can parents, being together in the same house under these conditions, meet the psychological needs of their children? This is also one of the issues that needs to be considered.”
Both joys and responsibilities should be shared in marriage
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated that marriage means sharing problems and responsibilities as much as happy moments, and said, “Couples should not only share negativities and life's burdens with each other. There should be happiness and entertainment in marriage. If this can be achieved, spouses will not be interested in others. In family therapies, we ask couples to write down what they enjoy doing with their spouses. Some say they want to walk in the rain, others want to exercise together. We suggest that couples increase the things they enjoy doing together. If spouses have difficulty following these recommendations during stormy periods in marriage, they can also seek professional help. Storms are overcome only when positive characteristics are reinforced.”
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan pointed out that if marriage turns into a war where the conflict of “I am strong” occurs between women and men, it will deviate from the emotionality it should carry.
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan noted that in traditional culture, women are seen as “someone to look after children and the home,” and said, “Some men even think that 'women should believe they are inferior.' There are even men who say, 'If I didn't want a son, I wouldn't have gotten married.' In such marriages, women feel worthless. For example, there are women who are much more intelligent and productive than men. In this case, if the husband says, 'my wife is trying to prove herself to me, she is acting contrary to what I want,' it means he has familial, cultural, or psychological prejudices. Problems are solved by seeking and finding the emotions behind prejudices.”