Üsküdar Üniversitesi Founding Rector Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan was a guest at the seminar organized by Sandıklı District National Education Directorate. In the online seminar, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan made evaluations under the title “Yunus Emre's Tolerance and Love in the Family”; “If we want to raise good children at home, we first need to create a warm atmosphere at home. A child should not come home, or a spouse should not come home, with the feeling of coming to a court. They should not come with the feeling of being judged or held accountable. In such situations, fear-based obedience arises. However, it is necessary to establish obedience based on heart and love.” he said.
“Love exists as a jewel within all of us”
Explaining the effect of love on humans through Yunus Emre's approach, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said: “Yunus Emre teaches us to control our desires and impulses, to turn our strengths, weaknesses, and the feeling of love not towards transient, worldly things, but towards divine love. Mevlana also does the same. Love exists as a jewel within all of us. Indeed, love creates a feeling of flying in humans. In love, because excessive dopamine is secreted in the brain, two things emerge. First, serious attachment and focus. Second, a feeling of intoxication. That's why the state of a person in love is very similar to that of people using drugs. They bribe the brain and achieve a fake emotion with various chemicals. After a while, even if the chemicals increasingly increase the dose taken, it becomes insufficient. Then, scenarios leading to schizophrenia emerge. Yunus Emre does this through mental training. The person takes thoughts, meaning he does something like, 'Love the bird, love the tree, love everything,' thereby first enriching the heart. He multiplies the emotions in the heart, and then shapes them with reason. So, Yunus Emre did not approach with only the heart; he united reason and heart.”
“A person who reads Yunus Emre gains a good guide to resolve unresolved conflicts within themselves”
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said: “Yunus Emre saw the truth. Because he saw the truth, he realized how insignificant worldly things are. He spent his life saying 'Everything is from Allah'. So, how can we benefit from Yunus Emre? Being Yunus and benefiting from him is not about dressing and walking around in the same clothes as Yunus... It is about taking Yunus, bringing those truths to today, and explaining them in today's attire. When we do this, Yunus Emre will revive and live in our culture in this era. We can also succeed in being a good example to our children in this way. Therefore, a person who reads Yunus Emre gains a good guide to resolve their own traumas and unresolved conflicts within themselves.”
“Gender may be biological, but marriage is sociological”
Emphasizing the importance of communication between parents on children, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated: “Currently, the family is such that neurobiologically, men and women are created needing each other. Neither can be alone. When they come together, a child takes three things as an example: their mother, their father, and the relationship between the mother and father. That's why if we want to raise good children at home, we first need to create a warm atmosphere at home. A child should not come home, or a spouse should not come home, with the feeling of coming to a court. They should not come with the feeling of being judged or held accountable. In such situations, fear-based obedience arises. However, it is necessary to establish obedience based on heart and love. The method for this in our time is persuasion and conviction. For this reason, the method of peace in the family is intra-family democracy. When we say democracy, let's not bring politics into it at all. Democracy is a method. This is a very important discovery of humanity. It is a very important discovery of people in the family. Gender may be biological, but marriage is sociological. After a peaceful family is formed, peaceful, healthy children grow up.”
“Everything apart from humans obeys Allah absolutely, but Allah has given free will only to humans”
Referring to Yunus Emre's approach to life, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said: “Behind every event, there is a hand of wisdom. Yunus Emre sees that hand of wisdom. That's why he doesn't value temporary praises at all. He tries to serve the truth. For this, the first step is Sharia. The second step is truth (haqiqat). The third step is spiritual knowledge (ma'rifat). Sharia demands justice. But justice, as it appears in the Holy Quran, goes hand in hand with ihsan. Ihsan is doing good without expecting anything in return. Dispensing justice is the minimum. But practicing ihsan is a virtue. Be a person of ihsan. Do not stay at the minimum, be someone who does good to people. Here we see vivid examples from Yunus's life. The reason Yunus Emre has lived until now, in my opinion, is his pure and authentic feelings, being selfless, and sincere (ikhlas). Ikhlas carries two meanings: one is being genuinely sincere, and the other is being for divine pleasure. For example, when starting prayer, we make an intention. Why? Because intention is important here. If a person corrupts their intention, they lose many things. Yunus Emre's intention is to approach Allah. Something happens, he twists his words, tries to connect people's minds, hearts, and feelings with Allah. Everything apart from humans obeys Allah absolutely, but Allah has given free will only to humans.”