Prof. Tayfun Doğan, a faculty member of the Department of Psychology at Üsküdar University's Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences, met with participants within the "Science Education Seminars for Society" organized by Üsküdar University.
Speaking at the seminar titled "Neuroscience of Human Relationships: The Social Brain," Prof. Tayfun Doğan emphasized that the most fundamental characteristic of humans is being a social being.
In his speech, Prof. Tayfun Doğan stated that he has been conducting studies on happiness, hope, and well-being in the field of positive psychology for many years, and recently refocused on human relationships and social intelligence.
Prof. Tayfun Doğan said, "If we were to define humans with a single adjective, the most accurate expression would be 'a social being.' Our brain is indeed shaped accordingly. From the moment we are born until the end of our lives, we need people who seek us, are curious about us, make us feel safe, and care about us. Human relationships are our natural habitat."
Synchronicity strengthens relationships
During the seminar, Prof. Doğan, who particularly focused on the concepts of simultaneity, harmony, and synchronization, stated that two or more people acting together create powerful effects on the brain.
Prof. Doğan said, "Breathing together, similar gestures and facial expressions, converging speech rhythms, and even synchronized heartbeats create a strong bond between people. This situation is almost like two people connecting. The brain also rewards this bond."
Prof. Doğan explained that the oxytocin hormone lies at the root of this reward mechanism, stating that oxytocin is commonly known as the love, bonding, and trust hormone.
Prof. Doğan stated, "When synchronicity is achieved, oxytocin is released. Oxytocin also reduces the release of cortisol, known as the stress hormone. Thus, stress decreases, trust increases, and conflicts diminish. This mechanism plays an important role in reducing arguments between spouses and quarrels among children."
Even hugging, walking together, singing are effective
Prof. Doğan stated that there are quite simple ways to increase oxytocin secretion in daily life and said that activities done together strengthen relationships.
Prof. Doğan said, "Cooking together, singing together, performing rhythmic movements, dancing, walking at the same pace, and even long hugs increase oxytocin secretion." He emphasized that hugs lasting more than 20 seconds, in particular, create relaxing effects on individuals.
Prof. Doğan stated that collective prayers, iftar dinners, and watching movies or matches together also support the same mechanism, adding, "When people meet in a common rhythm, they become more psychologically connected to each other."
Oxytocin calms the brain's alarm system
In the seminar, Prof. Doğan also made neuroscientific explanations regarding the brain's functioning, stating that oxytocin is secreted in the hypothalamus region of the brain and directly affects the amygdala.
Prof. Doğan, stating that the amygdala is the brain's early warning and alarm system, said, "When the amygdala senses danger, it makes us anxious and triggers stress hormones. However, oxytocin sends a message to the amygdala saying, 'everything is fine, you are safe.' This way, anxiety and stress are prevented before they even emerge."
Effective from job interviews to family relationships
Prof. Doğan stated that synchronicity yields significant results not only in family relationships but also in business and education life, adding that body language harmony, in particular, increases trust between people.
Prof. Doğan said, "Synchronization is very important in job interviews, teacher-student relationships, and therapist-client relationships. Developing compatible body language with the other party increases the likelihood of acceptance." He added that one of the most important elements of success in therapy processes is the rapport established with the client.
Also strengthens learning
Prof. Doğan stated that the harmony between teacher and student directly affects learning, and that this is one of the main reasons why beloved teachers' lessons are more productive.
Prof. Doğan stated, "When harmony is achieved between the teacher and the class, students grasp the lesson better. In fact, all of us have had periods in our lives when we understood a beloved teacher's lesson better. The underlying reason for this is synchronization."
Loneliness is not suitable for our nature
Emphasizing that humans are social beings, Prof. Doğan stated that loneliness has serious consequences at a biological level and said, "Loneliness is not suitable for our nature. So what does loneliness do? Why does it stress us? There are studies on this topic. In Cacioppo's study, participants were asked to measure their loneliness levels and physiological responses throughout the day. As a result, we observed this: People who feel lonely secrete cortisol as if they have been subjected to a physical attack."
Prof. Doğan stated that loneliness triggers the "fight or flight" response in the body, and that this has negative effects on the immune system and sleep. Prof. Doğan said, "In a state of loneliness, our body goes into alarm mode. Cortisol levels rise. This weakens our immune system and disrupts our sleep patterns. One of the important reasons for nighttime awakenings is high stress hormones. The brain constantly operates as if there is danger."
Social bonding is a chemical medicine
Prof. Tayfun Doğan, sharing examples from animal experiments in the seminar, said, "In experiments conducted on paralyzed mice, it is observed that mice in social environments recover much faster. In isolated mice, recovery is almost non-existent. The reason for this is the oxytocin hormone. Social bonding is actually a chemical medicine."
Prof. Doğan stated that recovery accelerates even when artificial oxytocin is administered, but emphasized that this should be achieved naturally and said, "We are not concluding 'go and take oxytocin' from this. We should increase oxytocin through natural means. Hugging, eating together, walking, singing... All of these stimulate oxytocin."
Addiction is the compensation for missing social connections
"Addiction is an attempt to compensate artificially for not being able to get the chemicals we need from social relationships," said Prof. Doğan, stating that this situation is not limited to substance addiction and added:
"Individuals who cannot establish sufficient social connections try to fill this void with food, internet, gambling, or other addictions. Loneliness is painful, and people seek different ways to alleviate this pain."
Loneliness is a warning signal
Prof. Doğan, stating that loneliness has an evolutionary meaning, said, "If loneliness were something enjoyable, the human species would become extinct. Loneliness gives us the message 'go and socialize.' Just like hunger... As hunger tells us 'find food,' loneliness tells us 'find people.'"
Modern city life is turning into a 'human zoo'
Prof. Doğan, drawing attention to how modern life increases loneliness, said, "Apartment living, lonely individuals... In reality, we are all like isolated mice. Depression, addiction, and overeating behaviors are increasing for this reason. Desmond Morris uses the phrase 'human zoo' for modern cities. If a zoo is not suitable for the nature of animals, then this life is not suitable for human nature either."
Socializing physically changes the brain
Prof. Doğan, also touching upon the effects of social interaction on brain structure, conveyed scientific findings as follows:
"Individuals living in social environments have thicker cerebral cortices. BDNF, which is a very important substance for brain development, increases. Connections between neurons strengthen. In other words, socializing develops the brain not only psychologically but also physiologically."
Prof. Tayfun Doğan said that scientific research spanning many years has revealed the decisive role of human relationships on quality of life.
What are the effects of human relationships on health and happiness?
In his speech, Prof. Doğan, drawing attention to the world-renowned Harvard study, explained the effect of human relationships on health and happiness with these words:
"There is a famous study. It is usually referred to as the Harvard happiness study in the media, but its real name is the Harvard Study of Adult Development. It started in 1938 and has now completed 88 years. Participants' blood values are checked, brain imaging is performed, psychological tests are applied, and one-on-one interviews are conducted every year. Many variables such as career, money, and status are examined. But the result is very clear: The number one factor in happiness and health is human relationships."
Prof. Doğan also touched upon the impact of good relationships on lifespan and diseases, saying, "If human relationships are good, if personal satisfaction is high, if loneliness is low; less Alzheimer's is observed, and people live healthier and longer. However, if loneliness exists, diseases like early death, heart attack, and dementia are more common. Therefore, a good life is built with good relationships."
Loneliness increases the risk of early death
Prof. Doğan, also referring to large-scale research on the effects of loneliness on health, stated, "Meta-analyses conducted on 3 million people show that chronic loneliness increases the risk of early death by 20-30 percent. It also raises the risk of dementia and heart diseases. In fact, chronic loneliness is as harmful as smoking 15 cigarettes a day."
A bad relationship can be more harmful than loneliness
Emphasizing the importance of healthy relationships, Prof. Doğan stated that not every social connection is positive, saying, "It is not right to cling to every relationship just to avoid being alone. We should ask the people who enter our lives this question: 'Will you be better for me than loneliness, or will you remind me of the beauty of solitude?' Because bad relationships sometimes cause more harm than loneliness."
The pain of separation has a biological basis
Prof. Doğan, stating that the emotional pain people experience when separated from their loved ones has a biological equivalent, said, "When we are with people we love, our brain gets used to certain chemicals. In cases of separation, loss, or distance, these chemicals are cut off, and we experience a kind of withdrawal. This is why we suffer. Over time, the brain accepts this situation, and healing begins."
Nurturing relationships produce oxytocin, toxic relationships increase stress
In the seminar, Prof. Doğan also touched upon the concepts of "nurturing" and "toxic" relationships, stating, "We do not have an inherent relationship style. We learn it later. Nurturing relationships are respectful, sincere, supportive, and make the other party feel valued. These types of relationships produce oxytocin. Toxic relationships, on the other hand, are critical, condescending, anger-filled, and harm the self-esteem of the other party. These produce cortisol."
Social support accelerates healing
Prof. Doğan, also drawing attention to the effect of social connections on physical health, said, "When oxytocin is released, cellular repair increases, and a natural pain-relieving effect occurs. It is no coincidence that recovery is faster if there are supportive people by one's side after surgery. Social support is a cure."
Hug at least three times a day
Prof. Doğan also shared simple recommendations that can be applied in daily life, especially emphasizing the importance of physical contact and communication, saying, "Hugs of at least 20 seconds release oxytocin. Hug at least three times a day. Make eye contact, put your phone away at the dinner table, spend time together. Even small acts of kindness create big impacts. The person who does good is happier than the person who receives good. Because they gain the greatest reward. Even a small help, a short conversation, increases a person's oxytocin level."
Socializing delays aging
Prof. Doğan, also touching upon the biological effects of socializing, drew attention to an important point regarding cell aging and said, "Structures called telomeres determine the aging of cells. Socializing slows down the shortening of these structures. This means social relationships provide a longer and healthier life."
In his speech, Prof. Doğan called out to the participants, saying, "Warm your heart. Include things that are good for you in your life. Build deep connections, do good, call your loved ones. Every person should hear the words 'I'm glad you exist' at least once a day. If you don't hear it, tell it to others."
Answering participants' questions at the end of the seminar, Prof. Doğan reminded that humans are social beings, concluding his words by saying, "We need each other. This is not a luxury, but a fundamental need."
