Prof. Nevzat Tarhan, President of Üsküdar University, met with educators within the scope of the Maarif Meetings organized under the leadership of the Istanbul Provincial Directorate of National Education Teacher Academy, in cooperation with the Maltepe District Directorate of National Education. Speaking on the theme “Promoting Peer Kindness and Psychological Resilience in School Climate and Culture,” Prof. Tarhan emphasized that peer bullying has become a global problem and pointed out that bullying behaviors are often rooted in deep emotional voids.
Stating that digitalization has placed children and young people under what he described as a form of “digital anesthesia,” Prof. Tarhan underlined that screen addiction distances children both from themselves and from real-life relationships. He emphasized the importance of cultivating empathy, kindness, and psychological resilience at an early age and highlighted teachers’ critical role in creating positive school and classroom climates. Prof. Tarhan also stressed that the true remedy for peer bullying is empathic communication.
The program was held at Maltepe Şehit Osman Yılmaz Girls’ Anatolian Imam Hatip High School.
The event attracted strong interest from educators working in the districts of Maltepe, Ataşehir, Ümraniye, and Sancaktepe. Among the attendees were Assoc. Prof. Murat Mücahit Yentür, Istanbul Provincial Director of National Education, and Hale Bağce Özbaş, District Director of National Education for Maltepe.
Assoc. Prof. Murat Mücahit Yentür: “Values-based education is our primary goal”
Speaking at the event, Assoc. Prof. Murat Mücahit Yentür drew attention to the importance of values-based education: “As teachers, we do the most meaningful work in life. We work with human beings, the most valuable creation in the universe. We do not go to school; we go to our students. Our working hours are not limited to class time. Teaching is a profession we live with both body and soul. That is why a short break, or a cup of tea does not tire us. Human relationships can be challenging at times, but what truly matters is where we stand in life and what we set as our goal. Modern capitalism is one of the main sources of human unhappiness. While excessive consumption may create an illusion of freedom, it leads people into other forms of dependency. Distinguishing real values from the meaning attributed to possessions, money, and status is more important than ever. Social and emotional learning, value construction, inclusive language, and rights awareness are now essential. Regardless of the era, the central subject of the world remains the same: the human being. This is why values-based education is one of the core pillars of the Türkiye Century Education Model.”
Hale Bağce Özbaş: “Peer relationships are a shared concern”
In her opening remarks, Hale Bağce Özbaş stated: “We previously worked closely with Üsküdar University in the district where I served before, and I believe we will continue to achieve valuable outcomes together, especially under your leadership. Today’s topic is extremely important. Peer relationships and the challenges our students face at school are issues we frequently encounter and sometimes struggle to understand. Prof. Nevzat Tarhan will introduce us to the concept of ‘Peer Kindness.’ Kindness is a highly inclusive concept that lies at the heart of education. It is often said that kindness is free, yet its impact is immense.”
Following the opening speeches, a talk titled “Peer Kindness and Psychological Resilience” was held, moderated by journalist Şaban Özdemir, with Prof. Nevzat Tarhan as the speaker.
Prof. Nevzat Tarhan: “There is a bully and there is a victim”
Highlighting that peer bullying has become a global issue, Prof. Tarhan stated: According to the literature, the OECD average for peer bullying in Europe is around 33 percent, while in Türkiye it reaches the 40 percent range. Interestingly, the rate is higher in Türkiye, and the socio-psychological reasons behind this should be further examined. In peer bullying, there is a bully and a victim, and sometimes the same individual may be both. This is not a new phenomenon, but digitalization has made it more widespread and visible. Due to the viral nature of social media, incidents that once affected only a few people can now reach dozens at the same time. Adolescence must be understood well. In psychology, adolescence is sometimes described as a ‘normal schizophrenic period,’ meaning that inconsistent and extreme behaviors are expected. Interestingly, even 1,400 years ago, similar behaviors were acknowledged as normal, as reflected in a saying attributed to the Prophet Muhammad describing puberty as a phase marked by irrationality.”
“There are deep emotional voids behind bullying”
Prof. Tarhan emphasized that one of the greatest mistakes is the normalization of lying: Adolescence is a period of identity confusion, marked by questions such as ‘Who am I?’ and ‘Where do I belong?’ Cultural, social, sexual, and ethnic identities intertwine during this phase. Young people typically form their identity around the age of 22, and making mistakes along the way is a natural part of the process. However, when lying becomes normalized, it often reflects a culture of pressure rather than fear. Excessive criticism creates a need to prove oneself and appear strong. As relationships and balances deteriorate, bullying behaviors often emerge, driven by deep emotional voids and distorted emotional interpretations.”
“The teacher must be the leader of the classroom”
Addressing the role of teachers, Prof. Tarhan stated: “If a positive school climate and a positive classroom environment can be established, it becomes possible to foster positive behaviors. Otherwise, when a quiet student is publicly questioned or judged, they withdraw even further. The teacher’s role is crucial. The classroom leader must be the teacher, not a student. A teacher is like a shepherd guiding a flock, recognizing those who lag behind, struggle, or need care, and addressing their needs. A classroom leader notices the quiet student and approaches them privately, asking, ‘You seem quiet. Is there anything I can do for you?’ This approach creates a strong environment of empathic communication.”
The remedy for peer bullying: Empathic Communication
Emphasizing that every incident should be seen as an educational opportunity, Prof. Nevzat Tarhan stated: “If you ask me to describe the remedy for peer bullying in a single sentence, it is this: empathic communication. The essence of positive communication is empathic communication. If you were to gather all forms of evil into one room, the door that lets them in would be a lack of empathy. When you examine studies on the psychology of evil, they all arrive at the same conclusion. I have reviewed the works of Simon Baron-Cohen on the psychology of evil, and all of them point to a deficiency of empathy. In developed countries, a child who has engaged in criminal behavior is not released from rehabilitation centers without first learning empathy, because without developing empathy, the same behaviors are likely to recur. That is why empathy must be taught. In the classroom, teachers should view every incident as an opportunity for education when creating a positive classroom climate. An educator who asks, ‘How can I resolve this situation empathically?’ is the one who solves the problem.”
“How you do something is as important as what you do”
Stating that kindness is a highly inclusive concept, Prof. Tarhan continued: “Respect is important, but kindness is more comprehensive than respect because kindness includes empathy. Rudeness is hurtful in human relationships; people are wounded by harshness. Kindness is the ability to present even the most difficult message or the harshest truth without causing harm. Bitter medicine is coated to make it easier to swallow. If you give it directly, it will be rejected, but when offered gently, it is accepted. Similarly, if a medicine meant to be taken orally is administered intravenously, it causes harm. In other words, how you do something is just as important as what you do. The aim of empathic communication is to improve and correct the other person’s behavior. When this is done empathically, the individual accepts the correction both cognitively and emotionally and is more likely to put it into practice. Empathy means putting yourself in the other person’s place and seeing the situation from their perspective. Empathy should not be confused with sympathy. Sympathy is crying with someone who is crying. Empathy is not that. Empathy is understanding emotions and transforming them.”
“Kindness follows actions, not words”
Explaining how kindness can be taught in practical terms, Prof. Tarhan said: “Kindness follows actions, not words. If you are kind, children observe and model that kindness. That is why we must lead not with spoken language, but with lived behavior. Awareness of kindness must be developed. Concepts such as kindness and empathy should find a place in the human mind, like opening a new window on a computer. First within ourselves, then in children, we must prioritize the idea: ‘I should be kind, I should not bully, I should be empathic.’ Learning how to act without causing harm or destruction is essential. If we follow these three steps, kindness can be learned in a practical and lasting way.”
What does the “Nihilist Penguin” tell us?
Responding to a question about a penguin video that recently went viral on social media, Prof. Tarhan shared the following reflections: “The video of a penguin separating from its flock, taken years ago from a nature documentary, has become not just a natural event but a global socio-psychological phenomenon. The story of this penguin, walking decisively toward the unknown despite the likelihood of loneliness and death, was embraced by millions of people. To understand why, we must analyze this metaphor through historical examples and explore the depths of human psychology. A similar situation is unfolding globally today. Reports by the United Nations show rising income inequality, unfair distribution of resources, and global injustice, all of which have accumulated a deep internal reaction within societies. That penguin has become a symbolic rebellion of the modern individual who feels trapped in the system, treated unjustly, and stripped of meaning.”
Why a penguin and not a child?
Prof. Tarhan explained that real suffering can sometimes be too heavy for the human mind to confront directly: “Instead of facing tragedies head-on, people find it easier to project their emotions through metaphors. The penguin becomes a vehicle for this projection. People react to global injustice, their own loneliness, and their desire to escape the system by attributing symbolic meaning to that penguin. The penguin leaving the flock represents the inner voice of the modern individual who feels lonely among crowds, crushed by the machinery of the system, and silently says, ‘I want to leave this flock too.’ Humanity, while watching that penguin, is actually mourning its own loneliness, injustices, and crisis of meaning. This video is a quiet but powerful social signal of the deterioration of global mental health and the urgent need for a profound shift in mindset.”
“Our children are being digitally anesthetized”
Concluding his remarks, Prof. Tarhan warned about what he described as “voluntary imperialism” driven by digital culture: “Today, the speed and entertainment industry brought by digitalization have become a shared global culture. Along with Hollywood culture, a form of voluntary imperialism is taking place. Does imperialism exist? Yes, but this one is voluntary. We embrace it willingly. Every young person today is almost a target of global digital imperialism. Digital traps are everywhere, and our children are being subjected to digital anesthesia. When they sit in front of screens, they disconnect from themselves and set aside their life priorities. And this does not affect only children; it affects all of us. In such an environment, managing our internal resources begins with awareness. The first step is self-analysis. Recognizing our strengths and weaknesses is the foundation of psychological resilience. The second step is questioning how we view ourselves, our environment, and our future. Do we see ourselves positively? How do we perceive the world around us? How do we envision the future? The answers to these questions form the basis of awareness.”
Following the talk, a gift was presented to Prof. Tarhan.
The program concluded with a group photo session.
