“There will be different coping methods after the earthquake”
Prof. Dr. Tarhan made statements about the effects of the earthquake that deeply affected Türkiye. Drawing attention to the individual effects of the earthquake, Tarhan stated that trauma coping methods may vary. Tarhan; “Two earthquakes occurred in our country. These earthquakes caused great damage and cracks on the earth. It was a game-changer; the plans and theories of geoscientists were disrupted. Of course, it has social, political, and individual effects. In terms of individual effects, there is usually an acute stress disorder in the first 2 weeks. After 6 or 8 weeks, a period known as post-traumatic stress disorder can occur, which severely impairs a person's quality of life. For example, in the USA, there are war traumas; war traumas occurred in those who were in Vietnam, Iraq, and Afghanistan. Nearly half of the people resorted to alcohol as a coping method. They can sleep with alcohol, they can calm down with alcohol. We also have different coping methods. In such processes, people become aggressive, belligerent, and boisterous. Some people also become passive, withdrawn, and depressed. Some people resort to religious coping methods. In the religious coping method, individuals take refuge in their beliefs and mental sanctuaries. Whichever religious belief system they belong to, there are those who believe in guardian angels, mental sanctuaries, and the belief in Tawhid. Since the belief in Tawhid is more rational, it satisfies people more. If a belief system is rational and fits within a logical framework, people believe in it.” he said.
“The belief in Tawhid facilitates understanding trauma”
Tarhan stated that the belief in Tawhid, being the closest to reason in traumas, helps to make sense of trauma, and he spoke about the relationship that should be established with people experiencing trauma. Tarhan; “People of this age are satisfied with beliefs based on reason. The existence of a divine power that knows and controls everything provides reassurance. Quantum physics also shows us that there is a reality beyond matter, a metaphysical, beyond-matter reality that cannot be measured by the five senses. In 2022, three quantum physicists received the Nobel prize. The existence of a universe independent of time and space, faster than the speed of light, was proven with Quantum Entanglement. It is stated that there is a higher power, a higher will that does not show itself to us, by saying that past and future exist simultaneously. This is the belief in Tawhid, the most rational belief. Whoever takes refuge in this belief, because it is rational regarding mental sanctuary, understands the living event more accurately and meaningfully. Because, at first, we do not find it correct to interpret. To someone experiencing trauma, at first, saying ‘don’t worry, it could be worse, it’s fate,’ etc., and trying to interpret that trauma makes the person feel very bad. The most important thing to do for people with post-traumatic stress disorder or in the initial period of trauma is to make them feel that they are not alone and to share their feelings. In other words, just holding their hand, making them feel you are by their side, meeting their basic needs, feels like medicine to them, but sitting down and giving advice or lectures will backfire.” he said.
“While those in the region experienced primary trauma during the earthquake, all of Türkiye experienced secondary trauma”
Tarhan stated that the earthquake caused people to question life and understand its transience, and that all of Türkiye was affected by this disaster with either primary or secondary trauma. Tarhan; “Earthquakes and natural disasters show us that death is very near and that our bodily comfort is not guaranteed. We see the possibility that our health, and even everything, may no longer go well. In a way, we have now begun to know our limits. These earthquakes shook our greed, insatiability, limitlessness, and capitalist morality. Such ingrained capitalist morality does not exist in Germany or America. There is such a degree of honesty and respect for human rights there, but lawlessness is also prevalent. So, in our society, it's the opposite: educated people have capitalist morality, while uneducated, traditional people are more benevolent because they continue the traditions passed down from our ancestors. In this earthquake, young people, often criticized as Generation Z, sprang into action on the very first day of the earthquake without us saying anything. University student clubs immediately organized, worked day and night, and bought diapers and water with their own allowances, making packages. They supported the earthquake region so much that we thought we might be doing an injustice to these young people. They are doing what is appropriate for their age or the times. One should not be hopeless and pessimistic when seeing some negativities. While those in the region experienced primary trauma during the earthquake, all of Türkiye experienced secondary trauma; everyone outside lost their cheer, and few people are as happy as they used to be.” he said.
“Children are affected more by family discord than by traumas like disasters”
Tarhan noted that the male and female brains react differently to traumas, emphasizing the importance of providing a warm family environment. Tarhan; “There is a difference between the female brain and the male brain. The male brain, the left brain, is related to logic, reasoning, analysis, speech, and calculation. The right brain is the feminine brain, and the left brain is the masculine brain. The right brain is concerned with music, art, aesthetics, and emotions. The prefrontal cortex provides balance between the two. Men should develop themselves emotionally and push themselves to learn empathy, while women should challenge themselves a bit more in terms of logic. Only then is balance achieved. Women have lower resistance to fear, so they are easily affected by traumas at first, but women have a restorative role because their brains are more prone to holistic thinking. The initial shock of fear affects them, but later they take on a restorative role. Their unifying and integrating role comes to the forefront more, which is why men and women have a complementary role to each other. Men and women should not be rivals but complementary. One supports in areas where physical strength is paramount, and the other supports in terms of recovery. After traumas like earthquakes, couples better understand the value of each other and their families. Life events, shocking experiences, and life occurrences bring a different perspective, such as people seeing each other's positive sides, leading to different evaluations and options, which positively develops relationships. Competitiveness and modernism have transformed male-female relationships into battles between men and women, with struggles for righteousness, money disputes, and constant ego wars. Just as villages unite against an enemy when there's an external threat, families also unite against external dangers. If parents focus on what they can do to ensure the home is a warm atmosphere and a safe space, the greatest benefit will be for the children. We wonder what will happen in traumas; in fact, children are more affected by marital discord than by earthquake trauma.” he said.
“Smart women bring their husbands and mothers-in-law into the team”
Tarhan stated that women's empathy is much stronger than men's, and that smart women bring their husbands and mothers-in-law into the team. Tarhan; “Women’s empathy is 2-3 steps ahead of men’s. For this reason, they tend to emotionalize events more and be more giving. This also suits men, who immediately step aside. However, in such situations, a woman should say, 'I'm doing this, and you do that.' She shouldn't establish a throne for the man inside the house or prepare a mansion for him. The man should also take responsibility. If there’s a capable woman who does everything, the man will go to the coffee shop and idle around, and then the women complain. So, you need to skillfully include your husband in the team. We even say that smart daughters-in-law bring their mothers-in-law into the team. When there’s an argument, if a smart daughter-in-law asks her mother-in-law, 'You used to make a wonderful water dish; can you tell me the recipe?', the mother-in-law’s prejudice will dissipate. When such events happen a few times, a positive change occurs. Bringing someone into the team does not mean taking them to your side physically. You will influence them emotionally and try to act together. Smart women also bring their men into the team. Such situations are for men who do not behave correctly; well-behaving men should not take it personally. A man with a sense of responsibility cannot sit idly while his wife carries all the burden. I am referring to egocentric individuals.” he said.
“If a person does not fall into despair and pessimism with growth-fostering trauma, that trauma strengthens them”
Tarhan stated that life events are resilience training, and pointed out that with growth-fostering trauma, a person will emerge stronger from that trauma. Tarhan; “The difficulties that come our way, the obstacles and challenges in our lives, are actually part of growth, of development. The troubles, pains, and realities we experience are part of growth, part of development. Therefore, mistakes are also part of perfection. What we call wrong or bad things become a stepping stone for us to go towards better and perfection. That's why in life events, you suffer at that moment, but the whole point here is not to fall into despair and pessimism, and to undergo resilience training. These life events become resilience training for us. If we endure and succeed, we emerge stronger towards better and more beautiful things. Our psychological defenses strengthen, our ego strength increases, and even growth-fostering trauma is experienced. That is, a person experiences trauma, suffers, but if they do not fall into despair and pessimism with this trauma, that trauma strengthens them. In Chinese, the word 'danger' consists of two concepts. One concept means threat, and the other means opportunity. When the concepts of threat and opportunity are brought together, it is called danger. If you reach for the threat, you lose many opportunities, but if you focus on the opportunity, that opportunity opens new doors and windows for you.” he said.
