Stating that the biggest reason for loneliness in old age is people making wrong investments in their psychological resilience, Psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said that the greatest need for people in old age is social support. Tarhan stated that despite the weakening of some physiological characteristics with aging, wisdom and sobriety increase, “Logical correct thinking, healthy decision-making increase, and having more accurate value judgments increase. If knowledge accumulation and experience combine with a mature personality, a happy elder emerges. In other words, such individuals become more consistent, tolerant, and patient.” he said.
“If knowledge and experience combine with a mature personality, a happy elder emerges”
Üsküdar Üniversitesi Founding Rector, Psychiatrist Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan, evaluated psychological resilience in the elderly and the importance of psychological resilience.
If there is healthy aging, individuals are happy in their later years
Noting that individuals in advanced age are happier if there is healthy aging, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “People in advanced age are no longer in the competition seat, not on the race track, but in the jury seat. However, if they still see themselves in the competition seat, they cannot be happy; that is, a person can achieve this if there is healthy aging. If there is no healthy aging, they try to be active in everything, trying to emulate the young. Every age has its beauties, its difficulties, and things it brings to a person. There are abilities a person loses over time. The mood is affected by which of these one focuses on. Psychological resilience in old age is formed in this way. Therefore, psychological resilience actually needs to be understood. Psychological resilience normally increases in the elderly in general.” he said.
Psychological resilience is the ability to recover easily when facing difficulties
Tarhan stated that psychological resilience is the ability of a person to quickly return to their former state when experiencing difficulties, “This usually increases in older people with mature personalities. Since old age is already an accumulation of experience in life, the elderly generally become wiser. The elderly provide balance in events that young people fear and panic about. This situation is similar in nature. Old wolves are wise. They stand at the very back and observe dangers approaching the pack from afar, alerting others. Young wolves go in front of the pack, old wolves go behind. The pack benefits from their experience. This also applies to humans. If young people benefit from the intuition and rational insights of the elderly in the face of life events, they can gain from their experiences. Psychological resilience is the ability to recover easily when facing difficulties.” he said.
Theoretical knowledge, practical experience, and mastery knowledge are not the same…
Tarhan stated that this situation is also important for the mental health of people in old age, “Old age, where one is asked for advice, consulted, questioned, and surrounded by young people, is an enjoyable old age. Of course, this is more possible in extended families. Young couples benefit from their experiences when raising children. They teach them mothering and fathering skills without breaking anything. Today, due to the nuclear family, this transfer of knowledge and experience does not happen. Young people try to learn from social media, the internet, and books, but theoretical knowledge, practical experience, and mastery knowledge are not the same.” he said.
A confederation of nuclear families has formed in our society
Stating that we have not completely lost the extended family structure as a society, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan mentioned that a foreign sociologist visiting our country conducted a study on our family structure, saying, “It seems like a nuclear family, but you are neither a nuclear family nor an extended family. You have become a confederation of nuclear families.” In some families, they live in the same apartment building but have separate homes. Most are together, meeting frequently, children playing and growing up together. Some problems come with it, but there is also great support. For example, when one person is sick, others provide support. In the earthquake zone, we saw the tremendous benefit of the extended family. All families immediately gathered, alleviated loneliness, relieved the loneliness of the elderly, and started staying in the same house.” he said.
Loneliness is one of the 3 major dangers awaiting the world!
Noting that the problem of loneliness is seen as one of the most important problems worldwide, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “At the World Economic Forum held in Davos in 2019, the three major dangers awaiting the world were stated as loneliness, climate change, and economic imbalance, meaning income inequality.” Tarhan noted that many side effects of loneliness have been revealed in studies, “Loneliness harms a person's physical health as much as smoking 15 cigarettes in a day. Living alone damages the immune system and harms health.” he said.
Those who are egocentric in their youth remain alone in old age…
Stating that the biggest reason for loneliness in old age is people doing wrong things regarding their psychological resilience, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “The biggest need for people in old age is social support. Whoever is egocentric in their youth remains alone in their old age. If the children they raise are egocentric, they say, ‘My comfort first. My life first, then my beloved.’ In this way, the person remains alone in later years. Their old age periods are also unhappy. While many things brought by modernism make our lives easier, unfortunately, they made us lose some of our human qualities…” he said.
What is the secret of happy elders?
Noting that the criteria related to old age in the world have also changed with the extension of life expectancy, with over 65 being considered old age and over 75 as advanced old age, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan stated that some physiological abilities weaken with aging. Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “Vision weakens, memory weakens. There are some diminishing abilities, for example, learning new things becomes more difficult. However, there are also increasing abilities in old age. For example, wisdom and sobriety increase. Logical correct thinking, healthy decision-making increase, and having more accurate value judgments increase. If knowledge accumulation and experience combine with a mature personality, a happy elder emerges. In other words, such individuals become more consistent, tolerant, and patient.” he said.
Incorrect living ages one the most!
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan also noted that learning to become wise should be learned from a young age, “In mental abilities, a person can easily compensate for those diminishing mental abilities by becoming wiser. Here, a person needs to create a life and lifestyle aimed at gaining these abilities at a young age. The thing that ages the human body the most is wrong living. It is said that Lokman Hekim (Luqman the Physician) stated for illness: '1 third from cold, 1 third from the throat, and 1 third from sorrow.' If we plan our lifestyle correctly from a young age, a person can have a quality old age in later periods.” he said.
The mind should be kept constantly open
Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan noted that the brain has a "use it or lose it" feature, “The thing that develops the brain the most is being open to new experiences and learning new information. It is also a person thinking about what they think. These are brain exercises that develop the brain. If the brain is rote, if it automatically keeps going back and forth on the same path, if it always does the same tasks, certain pathways of the brain in the areas it uses remain alive, while others degenerate. But if a person uses all parts of the brain, interprets, analyzes events, increases social contact, has good communication with the environment, and reads, their mind remains sharp even if they reach 100 years old.” he said.
Healthy aging is important
Expressing that there are sometimes prejudices in society that old age is seen as an incurable disease, Prof. Dr. Nevzat Tarhan said, “Old age is not a disease, that's why we don't say psychology of old age, we say psychology of aging. The use of the term anti-aging became problematic because it saw old age as an enemy. Now the term healthy aging is being used. Instead of seeing aging as a threat, it is important to age in a healthy way. For example, instead of seeing diseases as a threat, it is necessary to manage them, to accept and manage diseases instead of confronting them. When a person does this, they become happy.” he said.