Prof. Nevzat Tarhan: "The father should be the leader, not the boss at home"
Prof. Nevzat Tarhan was the guest of the 'Father School' Seminars organized by the Family and Religious Guidance Department of the General Directorate of Religious Services with the aim to strengthen the awareness of being a family on the basis of the Qur'an and Sunnah and to draw attention to the importance of the father in terms of rights and responsibilities in the family. Pointing out the changes in the family structure with modernism, Tarhan said that modernism, which presents the nuclear family as a model, almost commits hara-kiri. Emphasizing the importance of the role of the father, Tarhan said: "The father should be the leader, not the boss at home."
Family and Religious Guidance Bureau/Center personnel from all provincial and district mufti offices also participated in the program organized by the Directorate of Religious Affairs online.
The opening speech of the program, which started with the recitation of the Holy Quran, was made by Director General of Religious Services Dr. Şaban Kondi. On the occasion of the 100th anniversary of our Republic, Kondi wished peace and tranquility for our country and humanity and said that "We are deeply saddened by the oppression and human tragedy that took place in Palestine before the eyes of the whole world. I pray to my Lord for the salvation and salvation of Muslims." Referring to the material and moral responsibilities of being a father, Kondi stated that the project called father's school was followed with interest throughout the country.
After Dr. Şaban Kondi's speech, Prof. Nevzat Tarhan gave a conference on 'The Role of the Father in the Identity and Personality Development of the Child' in the program where there was intense participation.
The 3 parameters that establish psychology...
Pointing out that family relations are also affected by the changing world, President of Üsküdar University Prof. Nevzat Tarhan said that there are 3 parameters that build human psychology. Tarhan expressed these as 'Mind, Brain, Culture'. At first, they were great about the transfer of culture; grandmother and grandfather... Drawing attention to what is being done by the media, Tarhan noted that today, the transfer of culture is done by the media and digital media.
Modernism commits hara-kiri...
Emphasizing that there have been serious changes in the family structure with modernism, Tarhan said that single-person households and single-parent families have increased in the world. Tarhan pointed out the increase in the number of vulnerable households with the decrease in the size of households. Stating that modernism presents the nuclear family as a model, Tarhan said that this harms the family and modernism almost commits hara-kiri. He pointed out that while the number of marriages in Türkiye increased by 1.6 percent between 2001 and 2018, the divorce rate was 54.8 percent between the same years.
Virtues such as love, respect and consistency are the food of the child
Stating that virtues such as love, respect and consistency are the food of the child, Tarhan emphasized that children who have positive relations with their parents, are accepted by their fathers, whose words are listened to, taken seriously and honored will grow up with a healthy identity and personality. Tarhan continued his speech as follows:
"The child wants their life to have meaning, to be part of a great and important meaning. The child often learns from their father, what they will spend their life with and for what sake. We should not forget that what we do rather than what we say is permanent in children's lives. The father should be the leader, not the boss at home. The leader, on the other hand, does not herd his family, he guides the way; does not frighten, but arouses desire; he does not expect praise, he praises; he does not expect love, he loves."
Not everything the children want is done, but everything they say is listened to...
Saying that it is not enough to be a good scientist, a good businessman, a good spouse; however, it is necessary to be a good father, Tarhan emphasized the importance of the relationship between parents in raising children. Tarhan stated that "The house should have rules to become a safe and warm space. Irregularity brings uncertainty. This triggers anxiety. A home with love and discipline is very important for the development of our children. Not everything our children want is done, but everything they say should be listened to. It should not be forgotten that it is the adults who lose in father-child wars. The best gift a father can give to his child is to love his mother."
At the end of the conference, General Manager Dr. Şaban Kondi thanked Nevzat Tarhan by presenting him a gift.
Üsküdar News Agency (ÜNA)